


Brad's Snobby Dad

by Psyga315



Category: My Little Pony: Equestria Girls, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, That Guy with the Glasses
Genre: Adult Humor, Based Off A Tentative Name, Comedy, Condoms, Crossover, F/M, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, Meeting the Parents, Sex Jokes, Sexual Humor, Short, Suggestive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-09
Updated: 2013-06-09
Packaged: 2017-12-14 10:43:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/836032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Psyga315/pseuds/Psyga315
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Flash Sentry (previously named Brad) invites Twilight home for the night, while his father makes things very awkward for him at the dinner table.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Brad's Snobby Dad

**Author's Note:**

> I just thought of this idea not too long ago and before the premiere of Equestria Girls (spoilers ahoy), so if you notice that the name for Flash Sentry is wrong, that’s because the entire joke is based upon his nickname: Brad.

“Thanks again for letting me stay at your place for a while, Brad.” Twilight said Brad placed a salad before her.

“No probs. It’s not every day someone just appears out of nowhere without a place to stay.” Brad said as he sat down and prepared to eat some spaghetti. That’s when the door opened.

“Son, I’m home!” said a baritone voice as a man in a black suit came in. He had black eyes, glasses, and short black hair. He also had a beard and moustache. His skin was unlike any Twilight had ever seen since she came into this world. A little orange mixed with a little white. His skin was akin to Brad’s in that regard, though. He then looked at Twilight. “Aaaah, I’ve seen you actually decided to grow a pair.” The man said.

“Ah! Dad! Uh… This is Twilight! I just met her today in school. Uh… Would you mind if she stays with us?” Brad asked.

“Why of course! I mean, this might be your only chance, so you might wanna do it while she’s still here.” Brad’s dad said.

“Uh… Brad, what’s he talking about?” Twilight asked.

“I-it’s nothing, Twi.” Brad said.

“Ah, as always, my son’s a total pansy. Well, I’m gonna just go and… let you two try to mingle.” Brad’s dad said as he left the room.

“F-forgive my dad. He might be odd, but his heart’s in the right place.” Brad said. Just then, [music](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x6QZn9xiuOE) began to play.

“Huh? Oh! What lovely music!” Twilight said.

“Er… Yeah… Lovely… So anyways, you’re telling me something about a crown?” Brad asked.

“Actually, it’s a tiara… Though my friends and I joke about it and call it a ‘big crown thingy’. Ehe.” Twilight said.

“Ah, you got friends? That’s interesting.” Brad said.

“Uh… Everyone has friends, I don’t know how that’s interesting.” Twilight said.

“Well, I never really had the chance to make friends because-” Soon, something was flung onto the table. Twilight looked at it. It was something she had never saw before in her world. It was a strange packet with something circular stuck inside, making its presence known with it bulging out of the wrapping. On it were the words “TROJAN” and “INSTANT PLEASURE”.

“Huh, what’s this?” Twilight asked.

“… Excuse me.” Brad said, getting up from the table. He then left the dinner room. The music abruptly shut off as Twilight could hear Brad and his dad talking after.

“What is your problem?” Brad said.

“Look, at this rate, you’ll be a virgin forever. That’s not how I want the Jones legacy to go down. Dad scores a thousand chicks, son barely touches first base.” Brad’s dad said.

“Maybe I don’t wanna be a Jones! Gah! This is the reason why Sunset broke up with me!” Brad said.

“Oh, yeah, way to screw up an easy lay there.” Brad’s dad said.

“Dad! I don’t want you to embarrass me in front of Twily!” Brad said.

“I’m not! I’m saving you from embarrassing yourself!” Brad’s dad said.

“Well stop, you’re only embarrassing yourself as well.” Brad said as he left the room. He returned to the table, only to freeze up in realization as he saw Twilight observing carefully. “You… heard…” Brad said.

“Everything.” Twilight said. She then stood up and gave Brad a hug. “Your dad only wants what’s best for you.” Twilight said.

“Really? Because his snobby perverted attitude tells me otherwise!” Brad said.

“I’m sure if you look past that, you could see just how important he is to you.” Twilight said.

“What the hell do you think this is, Twi? Some kid’s show where a moral is to be presented with ham-handedness? This is reality, Twi. I’m quite surprised you want to support my dad after what he gave to us.” Brad said, pointing to the TROJAN packet.

“Oh, that’s what I’ve been meaning to ask. What is that? I haven’t seen it where I’m from.” Twilight said.

“…” Brad turned to see his father peaking behind the wall. His dad gave him the thumbs up. Brad then sighed. This was gonna be an awkward night.

 

**THE END**


End file.
